6/11

Nov 6

We drank for 1.3k

1.3k could be a person's proper salary.

1.3k could buy us alcohol to last a year.

1.3k could have been used to pay my loans.

1.3k could be the bursary amount given to students.

1.3k could have been used to get my driver's licence.

1.3k could have given us a proper holiday.

All it gave us was dehydration and exhaustion.

So I ask my self-control and common sense, Oasis style, "Where (the hell) were you when we were getting high?!"

Love Failure

I was asked a peculiar favour recently.

An inarticulate male requested me to articulate his thoughts into a poem so that he can impress a rather articulate female he had liked for a few months.

I initially said No, giving him my moral speech about how one should woo a girl with his own efforts. But he tempted me with beer.

So I told myself, "How hard can it be? Its just 8 lines of emo-filled crap. I will be done shortly."

I was wrong. Emo-filled crap is difficult to pen, especially if you don't want to sound desperate or cheesy. I have new found respect for Yeats and Cummings. I don't know how they churned such crap on a more regular basis.

To further add to my conundrum was the nagging fact that I knew little about the girl I was supposed to woo with my words.

I knew she was from poly and that she likes to read.

Our hero, on the other hand, is from ITE. A classic case of heroine rejecting our hero because she thinks he is not good enough and the hero sets out to prove his worth and win his lady love. The small problem here is that this hero probably doesn't even know how to spell WORTH. Hence, he SOSes me, the love poet, for help.

I write, erase, cancel, crumple, smoke and write again.

This process continues for a good 40 minutes before I conjure something that could pass off as our hero's work.

I email him the poem.

The email subject read: P.S. Do Not Give Her This Poem.

Of course, he didn't listen to me.

I got a call from him a few days ago. The girl had rejected him again. She said the poem had no effect on her and that she didn't understand his feelings.

I was shocked. "How can someone not like my poem?!", I asked him.

When he kept his silence, I quit the dramatics.

"She doesn't like the poem because you didn't write it. I did and I am not the one who likes her. I may have the words but you have the power to make them count." I said.

"I just wanted to impress her. I guess that will never happen.... so..how?" he asked.

I told him to consult a black magician who lives in Woodlands. Apparently, he excels in this kinda stuff.

I smiled when he said he was against all these mambo jambo stuff. I swore to strangle him when he his follow-up line was, "No la.. dont want other people helping me. Must do it by myself."

"Yes! Exactly my point. Do it on your own. You need to find your own magic. Its there somewhere," I say excitedly. Finally, I was getting through to him.

"Yes I will," he said rather determinedly.

"So what you gonna do?," I inquire.

"Watch tamil movies and then google dating stuff la," he replied matter-of-factly.

.............

I didn't know what to say.

But I did think to myself : "Chivalry and romance.. What has my generation done to you?"

Melanie Laurent is a pretty basterd.

In the alternate universe called celluloid, every now and then, there emerges an actress who fits my definition of 'intriguing beauty'.


There is usually something silent, ominous and intense about the way they look.


Before you know it, you are fixated.


And this year, that beauty turned out to be a basterd.









And to those who think she doesn't make smoking look good, I want to show you this:




Gosh, she looks awfully terrible.

Aadhavan

I HOPE its better than Ayan man....

The ranting and raving

When a 19-yr old tells me I need to act my age...

I should sit down and re-evaluate my life goals and desires.

When a 10-yr old thinks I am not acting my age...

I should tell him he thinks too much.

When an 8-yr old thinks she is more knowledgeable than me...

I should tell her to go fly kite.

When my mother thinks the 8 and 10-yr olds are right...

I should sit down and re-evaluate the purpose of my existence.

When Fullerton decides I am "under dressed" to patronise their restaurant...

I should sit down and re-evaluate their definition of under dressed. What else do you freaking want me to wear? A James Bond full suit?!

When I think I have ranted enough in this post...

I should leave at once.

Airtel Super Singer Junior 2009

Alka Ajith, 14. Mallu girl, who can sing in 12 different languages. Touted to be a finalist in the competition.




Priyanka, 14. The girl with the beautiful voice. Touted to be a finalist in the competition.
Soundarya, 14. The girl with the steady melodious voice.




Jayshree Nisha, GOING TO BE 10! The girl with the expressive voice.


I would like to thank the kind soul who compiled Alka's songs. There are more equally wonderful videos of the other girls. But.. I am too lazy to find them. Alka, Priyanka, Nisha and Soundarya are just the four I like. There are more talented kids this year and the girls by far have been exceptional. The boys are good but no outstanding ones as of yet.

Its 7.10 p.m. My mom is watching Vasantham Star. Yet again, I unwillingly fall into the realm of mediocre talent. Sigh... some things kids do know better.

Semantics

Friend : I broke up with my boyfriend. Will you go out with me?

Me: Er..

Friend: That didn't come out right, did it?

Me: Nope

Friend : Arrr.. I hate semantics.

Me: I love it. It makes you look unglam.

Friend: F*** off

Me: Obviously, vocab is not a problem for you.

Friend: I have more.. you wanna hear it?

Me: No. I will just F*** off